-Karthik Gurumurthy
The last birthday we spent with you was in August 2011. Now it is all just memories. We do miss your physical presence. I know you are always guiding us every step of the day every day in thoughts and actions. I miss the interactions, all the galatta and getting scolded by you. Would love to meet you sometime soon.
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-Karthik Gurumurthy
Today is Guru Purnima. Guru Purnima is an Indian festival that is celebrated as per the Hindu Moon Sign calendar to express reverence towards your Guru, your teacher or mentors. Etymologically, the word Guru has been derived from two parts – Gu that means darkness and Ru that is the antidote to the darkness.The word 'Guru' is defined as a person who leads people on the path to enlightenment. Guru removes avidya, or ignorance, which is a case of mistaken identity.
I wanted to take some time now to thank all my Gurus starting from my parents, my teachers in School, College, specifically my Math teacher from Sankara (Shri NR), Dr. KS Viswanathan -IGCAR(currently at IISER), Dr. A.K Mishra -IIT Madras, Dr. King Jordan, Dr. L. Aravind -NIH, Chris Wintrode, Leslie Jones, Michael Wang, Randy Canfield, Sheila M and my friends, seniors, relatives (too many to name!) and my students who continuously have helped me evolve to get better, transforming me one day at a time. I cannot thank all the teachers enough to take time out of their schedule to dispel darkness from my mind. I seek blessings of my Guru(s) on this auspicious day.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
All of us have blind spots and it is very important that we take time to be aware of them. If we want to develop your own ability to be more conscious of your strengths, weaknesses and how they are perceived by others, here are some steps one can possibly do:
1. Please try to get feedback from someone you trust other than the family. It should be someone in your life you trust 100%, who has your back and will tell you the truth. While you may want to ask a family member, there’s too many feelings and emotions tied with family and sometimes with family they may judge you and they might give you a sermon than honest feedback. Please make sure you prepare your friend in advance about what you are seeking and don’t be afraid of what they’ll say.
If the feedback you receive seems to be out of left field, let the other person know you are surprised and then ask for examples. Ask for an example of the last time you exhibited the behavior: For example, “Was there a specific time you felt I wasn’t listening carefully enough?” That may help take the sting off any unexpected criticism because it narrows it to some specific events as opposed to feeling like an overall character flaw.
2. Take a few days, a week or even a month or so before you determine what or how you want to react. Generally, there are three possibilities you can address the information:
Make a big change: If the feedback can improve your life across the board, move forward with making changes.
Make a small change: The information may not impact every aspect of your life, but will allow you to make improvements in small ways.
Do nothing: In some cases, the phrase “I am who I am” applies as long as you are aware of the consequences of not changing.
3. Forgive yourself and move forward
You probably won’t like everything you hear. But feeling bad about criticism is only human. Acknowledge how you feel, whether it’s angry, sad or ashamed, and then work on self-acceptance.
We are so focused on building self-esteem when what we should be doing is looking at self-acceptance. Once you can give yourself permission to not be perfect, you can identify what you can control and do something to change that behavior.
Being at peace with yourself is key to building self-acceptance. People who are most introspective make self-awareness a priority and commit to working on it every single day.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I consider myself very fortunate to work with some of the best companies and highest performers of our day. I noticed that many had succeeded at becoming the best in their space, but that once they did, they faced an even bigger challenge: how to become better.
When you are at the top of your game improvement are more incremental and harder fought. You have got few if any to emulate. You now are the leader, and just maintaining much less increasing that lead is difficult.
If you are already among the best, or even really good, why would you even want to get better?
First consider this: we all know how good we have become, but none of us know who good we could be. No person or organization I’ have ever worked with has ever claimed they were living or doing business at peak potential. Why is that? We simply don’t know what is possible, so we keep aiming to get better and find out just how good we could be. That makes life and business incredibly interesting.
I believe that there are three vital factors to consider for upgrading yourselves.
The first is change: with so many changes occurring around us, we need to improve our knowledge and skills just to keep up.
The second is customers. They have increasing expectations. Ever noticed that the more you do for customers, the more they expect? Of course. And that’s why you need to continue to increase your value proposition.
Finally, your capabilities are above whatever level you are performing at now. We don’t benchmark against our competitors, we benchmark against our capabilities.
Nobody gets better “accidentally.” Only wine improves with age without trying. You don’t accidentally improve significantly, reach the highest summits or make the greatest positive impact without intentionality.
How much do you want to get better? Teachers can teach you, coaches can coach you, and can pump you up but it is what you do with the information that matters.
Ongoing improvement requires a process and is based on principles you correctly and consistently apply. The exciting thing is, when are intentional and take action, the door to your future swings wide open. Your willingness to work at improving yourself is the secret sauce to realizing your full potential.
You supply the commitment to getting better coupled with the right plan and process and your effort will start to pay off. It is definitely worth it.
Not only will it benefit you, but it will also benefit the people around you.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
As young adults prepare to go off to college, most on them on their own for the first time, having to make important choices and do their own laundry, I like to pass along these simple rules:
-Karthik Gurumurthy
What I say is not adding value. I have some experience but not enough…. I will be found out. And made fun of. I don’t want to sound or be branded a phony;
Look into the mirror. You’ve been through it. Or experience this every time you’re asked to take something up: Speak at an event, lead a team, solve a problem...
The first thought that comes through is “hey, I’m not ready. Perhaps next year. I will direct you to an expert, I’m sure he will do a better job!”.
You’ve had successes in the past, have exhibited brilliance and leadership but internally, you write it off as luck, the team and some heavenly intervention! This is called Impostor Syndrome
The only way to counter the impostor syndrome is to get out of the comfort zone take it head on.
Do not let your own fear that you are not good enough stop you.
Say what you have to say.
Do what you have to do
What you have to say or do, do it; there is someone who needs to hear it. It will resonate and those who listen will get back to you. Feedback. It will substantiate what your doing.
Keep doing it and you will become better at it.
Two other methods that work:
-Karthik Gurumurthy
I have shared this quote from Michael Josephson before and from time-to-time we all need to think about the same.
"Ready or not, some day it will all come to an end. There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours, or days. All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten, will pass to someone else.
Your wealth, fame, and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance.
It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed.
Your grudges, resentments, frustrations, and jealousies will finally disappear.
So, too, your hopes, ambitions, plans, and to-do lists will expire.
The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.
It won't matter where you came from or what side of the tracks you lived on at the end.
It won't matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.
Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.
So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?
What will matter is not what you bought, but what you built; not what you got.. but what you gave.
What will matter is not your success, but your significance.
What will matter is not what you learned, but what you taught.
What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage, or sacrifice that enriched, empowered, or encouraged others to emulate your example.
What will matter is not your competence, but your character.
What will matter is not how many people you knew, but how many will feel a lasting loss when you're gone.
What will matter is not your memories, but the memories that live in those who loved you.
What will matter is how long you will be remembered, by whom, and for what.
Living a life that matters doesn't happen by accident. It's not a matter of circumstance, but of choice. Choose to live a life that matters.
How true this is. And Michael Josephson gives us reasons to think.
-Karthik Gurumurthy
-Karthik Gurumurthy
Dearest Appa,
We miss your physical presence. Happy 75th Birthday! You always taught us through your example and there is not a day that goes by without thinking about what you have done for us. One of the greatest things which you showed us by example is the attitude of Gratitude. You talked about how grateful you were every single day and always thanked God, family, friends. This is probably the best time I feel to express how thankful I am to have such a wonderful dad who set an amazing example. I am thankful for having the most caring Mom I could ever ask. I am thankful for all my Grandparents (both paternal and maternal) who worked hard and made it happen for the families. I am thankful to have wonderful brother Aravind who is always there for me for everything. I consider myself superblessed to get an awesome beautiful wife who is the most transparent person I know with amazing qualities being enthusiastic and great sense of innocence and love for people. I am blessed with my wonderful friends and each of them have helped me in multiple ways. The closest being Sudarsanam Raman (Susi), Vijay, PG, Balaji, Ranga who knows everything about me and still had chosen to be friends with me. There are lot of Gurus/bosses/ teachers/ coworker whom I am extremely thankful to know them, These are the CHANGE AGENTS. These people come in your lives and they transform your life for the best. My high school Math Teacher whom we used to refer as NR; Prof. AK Mishra and my favorite of all Dr. KS Viswanathan; Dr. V. Ramamurthy , Dr. Don Creighton , Computational Biology department at Johns Hopkins University L. Aravind, Subbu Viswanathan, Leslie Jones, Shekar Panchapekesan, Priya Sreedharan, Michael Wang, Sheila Minton, Yvon Descieux, Robert Marston, Randy Canfield, Pramukh Subramanian, Juli Kahanamoku. This is not in any specific order. I am hoping I didn't leave any of my change agents out. All these people have added tremendous value in my life on a day-to-day basis.
#ThankfulandBlessed #ThanksDad #ThanksAll